feelings of a ……(I don’t know, u decide)

Lets start this post with a good news. My job hunt seems to be nearing its destination. In the last few weeks I got the results of some of the exams I have been appearing for and quite luckily, I have managed to clear a few of them. I don’t know if I will be able to clear the next levels, but for now I am very happy. Almost super-excited you can say. Friends and relatives have multiplied my joy with their congratulations and good wishes. A hearty thanx to all of them 🙂

Some of you might be knowing one of my ambitions was to be a software engineer, though it is not my chosen career path. It is more of a hobby, or you might say passion like my guitar. My dad got a sniff of that. So he asked me if I wanted to join any computer course. I agreed at once and I am currently learning core and advanced Java at NIIT, Durgapur. Nowadays I have classes everyday in the evening. And when one is passionate about something, one hardly misses a chance of meeting ;). As usual our dear Anand Sir was instructing us to write a program. We were in the machine room, coz today we had our practical class. All of a sudden a awesomely handsome guy walks in with some other pretty girls and says “Sir, we are celebrating teacher’s day today. Please come with us”. We were already behind schedule, so sir didn’t wanna leave us for a second. But the guy didn’t budge, he tried pleading with him to persuade him. The girls joined in with him. Ultimately some other teachers intervened and our sir had to go. I felt something which reminded me of my school days and college years. Although my college years are just 1 n 1/2 years behind me, but this was something I hadn’t felt in a long time.

In every class I have been in, there were always some charismatic, handsome, strong etc guys. They always had a different sort of air about them. Literally we were in the same class, but they always belonged to some different higher class. They were like the celebrities. Never did anyone oppose or neglect them. Never did anyone pretend to be indifferent to their words and feelings. On the contrary their each and every emotion change was attended to by at least 3-4 other guys/girls. They often joined each other and picked on the underdogs. They were the teachers’ pets. Each and every event, may it be cultural/sports whatever, they were always the natural leaders. Like everybody else they too did silly mistakes, but nobody ever laughed at them for those. They always had this air of a know-all about them, and always looked down upon ignorance of useless baseless things (like name of the porn-star with the hugest booty).  Coz my confidence was always crushed under the attitude of these handsome bullies, I remained an introvert throughout school. Those affected me badly. Also, I hated them 😡

By now you might say that I was just jealous of those celebrity type guys/girls. Yeah I admit that. Coz I was never near to being handsome or charismatic or a highly talented geek, I felt jealous of them. I never liked the treatment the my world gave me. But being a staunch believer of the law of karma, now I know I got the treatment which I deserved. Mostly those are harmless far faded memories of the past now. But occasional chances like these, they do return to haunt me and when they do, I feel the same way I did all those years ago. I don’t know what you are thinking of me, but I would very much like to get rid of these childhood impressions off my mind. Got any ideas?

Bad-luck, Good-Luck? Or just co-incidence?

You decide for yourselves but whatever it was, I enjoyed it through and through 🙂

As a few of you might be knowing that I had my FCI tier 2 exam scheduled for this 3rd Feb. I was pretty excited and nervous. This exam if cleared could end my job hunt and secure my life with a government job, otherwise you know what. My exam center was at Umes Chandra College, Kolkata. Usually for exams in Kolkata I go to my big brother’s  place on the day before.

I had tickets for the Kolkata bus scheduled to depart at 1:00 am from city centre. I reached there with 15 minutes to spare.  Ten minutes to the departure, I was sitting at a place. My mind toggling between the exam, and jobs I had applied for that morning. My phone rang up, I received the call. The caller was an unknown lady, asking me if I was Somesh. She then told me that I  had an interview scheduled for 4th feb 11 am at Kolkata. I was exhilarated with the opportunity after a long time! I had a little consultation with my friend Arijit and accepted the offer. Then there was a bolt from the blue! I remembered that I did not have a single pair of formals. This was the first time that I was leaving for Kolkata without an extra pair of interview formals, coz I had a 8-10 kg yam (harvested from our backyard garden) for my brother in my backpack. Bad luck or pure co-incidence, I didn’t know what.

On the GT road towards Kolkata at a distance of about 45 minutes form here, is a place called Panagarh, infamous for traffic jams. Anyone leaving for Kolkata dreads Panagarh like anything, and if one is on a tight schedule he/she prefers taking the train to the bus. We were lucky, or so I thought as we passed through Panagarh without a hitch. By the time our bus stopped at Shaktigarh (halfway to Kolkata) I was pretty sure of reaching my destination before the evening rush hour traffic.  Little did I know that a few traffic jams were awaiting us on the way ahead. At a little distance from Shaktigarh we could see an increasing number of police vehicles along the way. Barriers were placed at numerous points on the highway to throttle traffic. Naturally we were delayed. Was this the price for our good-luck at Panagarh? Or pure co-incidence, I didn’t know what.

We reached esplanade, late by an hour. As usual I took the metro. But it was rush hour, I got myself jammed against the sliding door. At each station I had to get down and get back on. I got off at Tollygounge, took an auto-rickshaw. I was lost in my thoughts about the exam on the next day and didn’t notice anything else till the road and surroundings seemed unfamiliar. I asked the auto-wallah if I had crossed Ranikuthi, I was supposed to get off there. At once he stopped the auto and asked me to walk back, I was way past my destination. I won’t say this was bad luck, this was my fault. My streak of bad luck had finally ceased. 🙂 There was chicken biriyani for dinner! With tummy full, I went to bed early.  I woke up early in the morning, perhaps due to exam tension. Got ready and left off for the exam. It took me around an hour to reach college street, still I was there pretty early. I didn’t  have any friend or acquaintance with me, so I was kinda lonely, tired too from standing for half an hour.

A view from the 4th floor balcony of the college
A view from the 4th floor balcony of the college

The exam center was a named Umesh Chandra College by my admit card. On reaching there I found out that the same building had 4 different names including the one in my admit card. On inquiring I found out that the same building housed four different institutions, at different times of a day!  This was one hell of Multiplexing I have ever known 😉

My seat was at room 27B, 4th floor, it was quite tiring climb. Some were climbing the crowded stairs with their shoelaces untied. If someone had stepped on their laces by mistake, it would have been an accident of the scale of a stampede. Carelessness at its worst!  Anyway, we were at our places on time. The OMR sheets had been distributed and we were busy filling it up. The question papers were being distributed when someone raised voice saying he had got the wrong question paper. We were supposed to get Paper-2. But it turned out that our invigilator had brought the set of Paper-3. The room was already buzzing when another guy came in running saying all rooms had got the wrong set. The college itself had got the wrong set of papers.  After some time 3 official looking men came into our room to inform us that the exam had been postponed until further notice as all the exam centers in Kolkata had got the wrong set of papers. Some were infuriated. They had the LIC ADO exam on the same day and they didn’t get to sit for that because of this one. Their candles were burnt on both ends. But I was happy! Terribly happy because I had a few more weeks at least to prepare better. I came out with everybody else. It was time to go back home. I was waiting for the bus for Esplanade when I saw a tram of the same route coming up. I never had rode a tram before and I always wished to do so. There it was before me.

Now the problem was that I didn’t know if trams had any fixed stoppages or just stopped wherever needed like buses. I put out my hand to signal it to stop, but put it down quickly thinking it might look awkward. The tram didn’t stop, it slowed down. I guess the driver didn’t notice me, it slowed down for the traffic ahead. Whatever, I got up in the second

Inside the tram
Inside the tram

compartment. The conductor and the 2 passengers were looking at me as if thinking “this guy is insane”, because I was taking clicking pics of the compartment 😀 😀 . For me it was ten minutes of fun ride and I was excited like this was my first plane ride! 😉 Stupid, isnt it? I got off at esplanade took the Durgapur bus leaving at 11 15. Another coincidence was awaiting me. On the previous day I had got seat number 8, right behind the driver. On the way back, I got the same seat again! 😀

An emotional Get-Together

The day started with little excitement, I was gonna see my dearest ones after a gap of around 3 months. But I had no idea that this was gonna be the such an emotional day, that it left me with a nose blocked by held-back tears..

Indra was the first to reach college. I too had planned to get to my college by 9 in the morning, but a last minute appointment at the bank delayed me by around 2 hours. Some of you might know that I and my friends had built a mobile phone controlled robot car for our B.Tech project. I had brought it back home to show it to my parents. Alas! it didn’t work. I tried repairing it, but without success. Today I had planned to take it back and deposit it with my project guide. The 8B buses are always too much crowded for carrying any such delicate piece of work. So, I had to take another route and so forth. Anyway, getting off at my college I saw Avinandan with his better half. On entering the gates we saw Indra and Sneha at a distance. Sneha was a bit miffed. Her better half had scrapped his plans of coming and meeting us here coz of sudden fever. Otherwise it was great! we could not stop talking and smiling and laughing.. Needless to say, I kept cracking my fresh baked anecdotes whenever I felt the atmosphere settling down. My main target was Avinandan, coz his new-found girlfriend has brought about some seemingly impossible changes in him, that too in a couple of months.  So, we set off to get our N.O.Cs and final mark-sheets from the Registrar. In the course we went to different labs we had attended in this 4 years. Memories came flooding back as we visited them. The bench vices of the workshop, the drill machine diagram diagram on the black board, those huge DC motors in the electrical lab.. With all the signatures we went to the Admin Block for the next formalities. We were surprised to know that the piece of paper with all those signatures was not to be submitted today 😦 , we got to wait till December to submit it. Then we shall get our certificates.

So, finishing off this business we went off to Panch-Phoron, a restaurant nearby. On the way we saw a lot of policemen armed with guns and sticks. Reason? The town development authority has decided to demolish all illegal constructions in the city. They didn’t even spare the roadside makeshift food stalls. The ambient scenes could have dampened our spirits any other day, but today. We were too charged up for that! We were so busy talking that we hadn’t noticed that we were walking past our destination 😉 . It was Avinandan who pointed it out. The restaurant was on the 2nd floor. We first thought of taking the lift. But not being patient enough for the lift to come down, we set off the stairs.

We took an 8 chaired table for ourselves. Handed over a paper napkin to Sneha, she took out a pen and started . She is the manager at all out outings. She finalizes the stuff we order, how much each one has to pay etc. I had expected an item of PANEER, but no one else seemed to think on my line and so it wasn’t ordered. We ordered 4 plates of mix veg, 3 plates of biriyani and some more plates of some chicken items (I can’t recall the names :P). It was quite a while before we were served. We spent the time listening to Arijit’s experiences at Durgapur Steel Plant (he works there), telling Avinandan’s new found love how much had she changed him in these last 3 months who kept complaining about how much of a trouble it was to bunk a day at his job, I got my rakhi from dear sister Priyanka, teased Sneha how she never likes her own smiling photos, took a few pics etc. Finally, it was time to dig in! The food had been served. I was damned hungry.

There was a shortage of gravy 😦 but it was all great! Sneha and Priyanka could not finish their cold drinks, which I happily finished off! I am well known among my friends for my vicious appetite. All were saying they were full to their throats, but I felt like I could finish off another half plate of mix veg (though after a loud burp). We paid the bill and came out. Again thought of taking the lift. The lift showed “overweight” sign and I had to get off. We all met at the bottom of the stairs. Avinandan and his girlfriend were the first to take off for their workplace at city-center. They were getting late. Then it was Sneha’s turn, she took another auto to city-center bus stand. At last myself, Indra, Priyanka and Arijit were left. We took the next bus to city-center.

Within half an hour we were at city center bus stand. Sneha was smiling and waving furiously at us from her window side seat, the bus was “vroom”ing. There was still a minute left for the bus to depart. We kept talking but she insisted us to go on, enjoy the evening and not wait for her. Suddenly she turned her face away from the window. We could sense her choking on her cries. A few seconds later, she did look back at us, smiling, once more. But this time her eyes welled up and she could not hold back her tears. The bus started moving, tearing away her tearful eyes from our view. Slowly the bus took a turn around a barrier and she was gone.. I caught a glimpse of Priyanka misty eyed, before she wiped them off.. I could neither cry properly nor could I brush away the emotions (like I always do). I don’t know what was holding back my tears. My eyes were red, but my nose was runny..

The last time we had parted, we weren’t so much emotional. We had a reason which made sure that we would meet within another couple of months. But this is the final parting shot.. This time, we really don’t know when shall we meet again, if at all..

SantuOnline is 2 years old!

“YEAAAAAAHOOOOOOOOO!!!!!  SantuOnline is 2 years old!”. This was my first thought right after getting up this morning! I am sooo happy, seems like it is my own birthday! I still remember those days when I used to plead with my friends to visit my blog (I didn’t know how to get visits then). Most didn’t  care. Indrajit was the only one who used to comment on each of my posts and I had to be content with that.  It was only this January that I started blogging like I meant it and now have a handsome reader base! I am obliged. I guess I have improved a lot as a writer since I started.

Here are some old posts of mine. I know they aren’t as good as as my latest posts, still take a peek at them. Let it be your B’day gift to my blog! 😉

My very first post, Hello world! . Notice the way I have written? I didn’t know what to write and how to write then.

My first brush with wildlife photography, I clicked an awesome pic of a grasshopper at a distance of just 5cm!

CUTEsome THREEsome, I clicked a mommy dog and two puppies suckling! Cute indeed! U cant miss this one.

uffffffffff…….. chaap ketechhe   a post on an exam. I had been  in a pressure-cooker situation that day!

life at the end of two years in college  The title is explanatory enough. A sentimental one..

curious cutie Snap of a li’l cat, by my friend Tanushree.

HAD A GREAT FALL, I fell while climbing down a hill.

a Friendship day post! This is one of my personal favorites! I celebrated the afternoon of Friendship day, at a river side with my closest friends.

have free time, but I am trying to relax A miscellaneous post on a day I was bored of doing nothing 🙂

a Lovely Sunset.. Another one of my rarely awesome pics! Please, dont miss this. This is a pic of my hometown.

and lastly the series of 4 posts about  a job interview I had appeared for. My very 1st one away from home!

A JOB INTERVIEW, 3rd in my life,1st one away from home
A JOB INTERVIEW, 3rd in my life,1st one away from home -> The written test
A JOB INTERVIEW, 3rd in my life,1st one away from home -> Results are declared..
A JOB INTERVIEW, 3rd in my life,1st one away from home-> the journey ends..
 

a milestone on our way to the end..

Yesterday, it was the last lab exam of my B.Tech.. getting pretty nostalgic right now. But this attack isnt as emotional as I had expected..

The day started with much excitement. Remember that song I was talking about in “Finally it happened“. We were planning to do a video recording of the song and dedicate it to all of us friends. Anyway, it was a typical Indian summer day. News forecast had warned that it was going to be 45 °C around noon, and it was hot indeed. Anyway, after the exams I took the bus to my friend, Sudipta’s mess.

Sudipta, posing with the guitar

Getting down at the bus stoppage I thought, I might have a bottle of Amul Kool, (saffron flavored milk). I bought one. No sooner had I put it to my lips, than I noticed two hooded guys approaching me. I was puzzled for a second at least, but their style of walking gave away. At once I recognised them; one was Suvayan (our lead singer)

Suvayan, our lead vocalist

and the other Avinandan (our only musician).

Avinandan, our only musician

Thankfully, they had come to pick me up. I was on the pillion when I heard the shopkeeper caliing me back. He had forgotten that I had already paid and was asking for it again. Damn! I never cheat on anybody, and how dare did he accuse me? Somehow, I managed to convince him of the truth and stomped off.. I left my bottle of Amul Kool there, it still had a some left in it..

With the usual welcome, I saw Suvajit was setting the plates and dishes for a treat of chicken Biriyani.

Suvajit, serving the BIRIYANI

It didn’t take much time to finish off the Biriyani, washed down with a few gulps of Thums-up. Then started the rehearsals for the song.

initial tuning..
Suvajit, posing with the guitar

Avinandan would think up and play some tunes and we would try to match it to the lyrics. It went on for around 20 mins. Finally we come to a decision on the song opening tunes. Then the rest went like a breeze. The different stanzas were being sung along with with the guitar.  The song video was being shot in pieces. Since this was our first chorus with a guitar in company, little flaws came up now and then. Somewhere the lines were too long, somewhere too short. But it was funny posing as composers and music directors 😉 .

We didn’t know when time flew by, until we heard someone shouting outside. We had frozen in our places for a minute, till Sudipta came back. He explained that ourselves, composing songs and singing at the top of our lungs, had added to his neighbors’ misery on that hot afternoon. Our rehearsals came to an abrupt halt, but we were too charged up to stop the shooting midway.. Suvajit then decided that we better go to another place (his previous mess), and within 10 minutes we were there. The juniors living there were kind enough to let us go on with our shooting, even after the abrupt murder of their afternoon naps on such a hot day. We are grateful to them. Now, the final stanzas were shot. Still, we hadn’t shot the whole song in a single video. So, it we shot another two to three videos on the whole song. The last one was the best. I have put it on YouTube, click here.

Finally, it happened!

Imagine, you are standing on a high cliff, cornered. You have got to jump, there is no other way. You have a parachute strapped on. There is a sudden urge to jump, yet the next moment you find yourself balancing on the edge.. This loop goes on until you suddenly find yourself weightless, flying, the ground accelerating towards you. Pulling on your parachute strings, you come to a safe landing. You cant help applauding yourself at the feat you have accomplished! You think, “That pumping adrenaline, it was more of fun than fear after all”

Something like that happened to me yesterday, twice. Don’t worry, I wasn’t on any high cliff. I was safe and sound on the surface of earth.

First one happened when my friend Suvayan asked me to sing a song, composed by some of my friends. Never before I have sung or danced or given any speech in public. Whenever I sing, I have my headphones on my ears to spare me hearing my own singing. But, Suvayan was adamant. He wont let me go without it, and I was sort of hanging on the edge, wanting to jump, yet not able to.. Sudipta, Arijit, Suvayan all sang the song. Somehow I could not. My voice was imprisoned in my throat for a couple of minutes and suddenly, it broke free! It was kinda muffled, and I was a bit quick to finish the song. Heart pounding against my ribs, I was complimented, which meant I had made a safe landing.. 😀 again I sang it for 7 or 8 times. By now, it was quite funny (more like adventure for me)! Every-time he would point out the little flaws and try to rectify those. I think I did quite well! Finally, I had heard myself singing in public, without the headphones 🙂 The bathroom singer has come out of the bathroom 😛

Guess which one is me..

Second one happened at my college. We had our college fest yesterday. Though the fest was going on for two days, we joined it on the last evening. There were two events scheduled, performances by Vineet and by Underground Authority. Man, Vineet has a marvelous voice. With him singing, everybody around was jumping and dancing in frenzy! I had to have my hanky tied across my face (not to inhale the sand clouds being kicked up). Initially, I was just standing, clapping in tune and singing with him. But, when he came up with his Himesh version of Jodha-Akbar title song, we were all into another world! Midway into the song I realized, I was dancing!! (another never-before for me 😀 ) And it went on till the end.. By the time Vineet signed off, I had a biting pain across my belly. But that could not stop me for long. Half an hour later, I was again dancing to the rocking tunes of Underground Authority..

Underground Authority
kicking up sand clouds!

The last fest of my college life, an evening I would not forget… Thank you all my juniors who have put up such a spectacular show on such shoestring budget. It was a fantabulous evening.. 😀 😀

a Lovely Sunset..

This post is dedicated to those people, who dont like my beloved DURGAPUR.I have some friends and techers and seniors alike, they dont like durgapur. They say this city is lifeless, it has not got any sightseeing places, it is too hot in summer etc etc.. whatever they may say, i know, that my beloved city is best in more than one ways, and one of the ways is being shown above..

The scenery posted here was clicked in the exact middle of my town, not from any remote edge. People say there arent many sightseeing places in durgapur, but what we got here cant be found anywhere else. For example, watch sunset in kolkata, u will have to go to the GANGES.

In durgapur, we see these breathtaking sights everyday, right in the middle of my city..

put in your comments people..