Sad.. on both ends of the bridge!

seems ’bout right!

Maybe I am being hormonal like a girl. Maybe it is the effect of middle age setting in. Maybe coz I saw the movie Bob Biswas. I need to write. I feel overwhelmed with depressing feelings and I need to get them out. Maybe coz I am alone only for 2 days now, and it will be over in a week, but I am feeling some feelings which I don’t like so much. I am already fighting a bout of common cold settling inside my nose. My nose which I don’t consciously feel all of the time is making its presence registered. Pulling back snot crawling down my left nostril I am typing on…

I completed the series Friends yesterday. Yay! I have finally crossed the bridge to the side where all the “Friends”-heads live! People would say move on to a new series and keep binging I guess. Sure, good point. But dunno why, I am not feeling those usual feelings. Strangely enough this means a totally different thing for me. All my life I have seen people do stuff I can’t or haven’t been able to, yet very much wanted. Not one or two things. Lots of things, some stuff I don’t even remember that I would have once ever thought of ever doing. Those “things” range from being good at studies and games to things like watching popular web-series with a cult like followings so I might be able to participate in conversations. So lots of stuff.

So basically I have an infinite number of stuff I ever wanted to do, and if you think another way so does everyone. So I am not any different from anyone else. I am just one among those infinite idiots who get overwhelmed with stupid little emotions. Completing Friends was one such thing I had in my mind, rather back of my mind. When I made these goals in my mind, I always used to think like Nah! that stuff is for rich kids, or poor kids with real good luck. I will just keep dreaming up new things and burying them in my mind. Yes, that actually made me happy! Now that I think about it from a somewhat aged and maybe little matured( I doubt this ) sort of view point. Dreaming that I could do some of those stuff someday did make me happy right there. Daydreamer I was, am still. It never felt like I would plan to do these leave alone actually doing them. Here I realize I am a master procrastinator too! Wow! Just a thought, a dream maybe and just poof! That used to be my dose of Dopamine! why did I plan on things as such. Oh yes! I remember now, one of those stuff was to be a hell of a programmer! Like a hacker or something. Alas! I am stuck with Cobol on mainframe for the last 8 years, but I did achieve my dream of being a coder in a software company. I love my job, but equally suck at my job believe me! I mess up stuff with so many silly mistakes that my supervisors/managers just keep me on projects coz they can’t find a better resource. Here, I am my own competition, but in a bad way. Back to the point I do have achieved one of my such small dreams of being a coder, just in not the way I expected. I got married to my love which is way way wayyyyyyy beyond my wildest reality checks and possibilities. I bought a flat with her, I got a car for us. I am buried deep in EMIs but I do have a minuscule number of stuff from among the infinitely huge list of things I ever wanted, with me as of today.

So what this rambling is all about? It is hard for me to believe that I am completing, to be precise ticking things off that bucket list. I should be happy! But I am not. I am trying hard to understand it but all I am feeling are pangs in my stomach as if something is gone.. As if a very near and dear one is gone from me forever. I guess I have been carrying these buried stuff for so long in my mind, that they became a part of my life, my personality. It is actually hurting like I lost someone dearest. Is this normal? Yes I am 32 now, it is indeed sort of bad feeling for me now that almost half my life is over now taking the average age of Indians nowadays. On one hand I am sad that I haven’t been able to accomplish so many things! Also I am sad about the stuff I have actually done. What the hell is this? Am I in need of a psychiatrist? Maybe I am. I want some one who can put these feelings at ease. But then when someone would actually provide closure to these I might be missing these feelings too I guess…. Still anyone with any ideas or at least a similar story? It should make me feel better I guess. After all opening up is one of the reasons why we write..

A job Interview, an adventure -> 2nd day, Written test and Card tricks

Funny enough, this day started around 4 in the morning! Actually, it was a cat moaning, and those who know it know well how much disturbing and irritating it is. A few times I left my bed to shoo away the cat, but it was beyond my reach behind a door. By the time of my 4th attempt, the cat had dared to appear before me. I was so angry I could have strangled it bare-hand even before it could take out its claws but, fortunately enough, it managed to give me the slip by a few centimeters and fled for its life. Next thing I remember is waking up around 5. A thought hit me like a hammer, “OMG! I have forgotten to bring my resume!!”. Imagine my situation. I had gone for an interview without my resume!! I felt chilly for a few seconds, but then another idea warmed me up! I would have needed the resume on the next day only if I managed to pass the written test.There was ample time in hand. So, I was back on track! here are some pics I snapped in the morning..

Sudipta had finished his morning business in the only toilet for the whole floor and it was my turn. Avinandan was as late as ever. Even after jostling him we managed to get him out of bed only after 6. By the time he was ready and packed we were at Sealdah station buying tickets. Among the three of us, Sudipta is the most punctual and Avinandan the least. I am somewhere in between 😉 .  We were waiting.. waiting on the train..waiting for the train to leave or Avinandan to come, whichever came first. All of a sudden Avinandan’s head and his tall figure popped up among the crowd far away, then he ran the length to our coach with the air of a “Bollywood hero chasing his love“. Half a minute late and he would have missed this train. We departed from Sealdah, promising ourselves that we wont go to that horrible hotel again no matter what happens.  On our opposite side, a young man in interview formals was sitting beside the window. I was hungry. Decided to have a pack of “CHOLA-MIXTURE” (sprouting grams mixed with chopped onions and salts). Since I was awfully hungry, I hadn’t noticed the dripping spice water smeared all over my hands. At last I washed my hand and shook my hands dry (my hanky was in my backpack) and that window side person gave me a glare. Though I told him an inaudible sorry, the milk had been spilled. At least it animated his expressionless face to some extent! 😛

Getting off at Madhyamgram station Sudipta and Avinandan had a cup of tea each. Both were too tense to eat anything. The drone of a plane  passing overhead told us that we were quite near to the DumDum Airport. Looked above, it was an IndiGo plane.  I had a funny yet strange thought seeing the planes overhead, passing so near. I thought what if the plane stops mid-air and falls on our heads, coz literally they looked like hanging from the sky 🙂  We were told that we were gonna be picked up by a bus at the station, and then at another bus stop. We were confused, didn’t know which way to go. Started walking. After a little distance we noticed there were bands of guys and girls who were no less confused. They too were wandering without a clue. The looks in those eyes, we knew we were in the same boat. The scattered groups congregated under a flyover. Someone told “lets go to the next pick up point”, and we all did so. Groups of 4-5 took a rickshaw van each and off we went. It was a fun ride!

Got off at Madyamgram Chowmatha. The traffic police gestured us to go to the other side of the road, the college was in that direction. Soon a small yellow bus appeared. We scrambled to get on to it. I was luck, I got a window seat. Within minutes the bus was jam-packed and we started for our destination, “Camellia Institute of  Technology”. I didn’t look behind but I was pretty sure that many were left standing at the bus stop. It took around10 minutes.

The college campus..

The college is situated in the middle of a grassy wetland. No facilities such as transport or any good hotel nearby. The entrance itself smells awful coz of the high drain passing in its front. Anyway, we had to ourselves registered and authenticated. To that I said to my friends “None except those who have lost their minds will come here willingly, so there isn’t a need for authentication. We won’t have come here unless we desperately needed a job” . We were asked to sit in a medium sized auditorium. there we were supposedto take the test there. The people from “Exilant Technologies” had come. At first they arranged us into neat rows and columns. Then we were given answer sheets and question papers and the test started. It was a test of 15 questions, 45 minutes. My question set was easier, I had completed it within 20 minutes. Most of those sitting around me were slogging on till the 45th minute calculating and writing. The papers were taken back and we were told to assemble by 3 pm for the results. We went to the canteen for lunch. Avinandan had come here before, so he led the way. On reaching there we got a surprise!!! Another group of student from our college had gone there. We were searching for them, they for us and we hadn’t discovered each other till then 🙂 I had 4 parathas for lunch and back we went. There was a lot of time left so we decided to roam about in the college. After some time we sat on a balcony. O! I forgot to mention. Sukanto and Debashish, another two friends of mine had invited us to stay at their hostel for the night. I was immensely relieved!!

Sitting on the balcony..

By 3 pm sharp, the company guys had came to the auditorium. To my utter surprise my name was 2nd on the list! I had cleared the written test. Waow! what a feeling that was with the whole room looking at me. My friends congratulated me. I was asked to go to another room in another building. It was for a pre-placement talk. Sitting in that A/C hall, I was wondering if any more of my friends had cleared the test (Later on I came to know that another one did clear, but he had left for home already). I was a bit sad that neither Avinandan nor Sudipta had cleared the test. The placement talk went on for an hour and we were on our way back. Sudipta was feeling sick, so he had already left for home. Avinandan was kind enough to stay back with me, even though he didn’t have anything else to do. We went to DumDum. There we called up Debashish for the directions. He asked us to take an auto to “Khamkheyali Songho”, which means “the absent-minded group”. Kolkata is famous for such funny names! We were escorted to their room. Compared to what we had gone through the previous night, this place seemed like heaven! Soon we all went out for a meal. Sukanta was the hungriest among us. We went to a resturaunt, woke up the sleeping owner-cum-cook and ordered for 5 plates of noodles. Afterwards we returned as we were too tired to hang out any more.

5-6 people live in these guys’ room. The funniest of them all is a skinny Sikkimese. He is a student of BESU, Sibpur. He looks like he is always sort of intoxicated (which he actually is). Never mind, what I liked most was his card tricks. He is a master at card magic. He deftly performed many tricks leaving me and Avinandan awestruck. Initially I was an active audience, but after a few tricks I got too embarrassed to be fooled again. I pretended not to notice, but who could resist.. He is awesome!! Raghu, Debashis and Sukanta did treat us well. Sukanta even gave me a animated movie “Puss in boots” !! I would like to thank them again, they saved us from going back into that hell-hole. 🙂 For dinner I had a Bengali Thali and a bottle of Amul KOOL!

So this is how the 2nd night ends.. U know I skipped a lot of things, otherwise this post would have been even longer.

A job Interview, an adventure -> the 1st day

Let’s start the story on the day we left home. Me and my two friends Sudipta and Avinandan, were supposed to meet at Durgapur station. We were a bit late, still we managed to catch the train to Dakhineswar, the Jammu Tawi Express. We had general compartment tickets, but seeing the general compartments packed full; we decided to get on the sleeper coaches, which is illegal. Bad luck, we were caught by the TT soon. He was hell-bent on slapping a fine on the three of us. Thanx to Avinandan, we somehow managed to convince him and he let us go. He gave us strict orders to get off at the next station or go to the general compartments. So we did. Just as the train reached the next station, we got off and ran. Bad luck again, we were into the coaches near the end and the general coaches were right next to the engine. After running the whole length of the train panting for breath, we hopped on to the general coach and the engine gave the whistle. There was just space for the three of us and our backpacks. We were a bit tense if we would have to stand throughout the journey, but thank God! Halfway to our destination at Burdwan station, the crowd lightened up and we got seats. It was raining hard, so all the windows were closed. In such a closed coach if someone next to you farts every minute, what would it be like? It was horrible. It was like getting drowned, literally I could not breathe. Someone really needed to go to the toilet, I just could not guess who. At last, around half an hour to our destination I got up from my seat. I could not have sat there for another minute without killing myself. So, finally we were at Dakhineswar.

Dakhineswar station

This place is the famous for a temple complex of the Hindu goddess ”Kali”. Legend says that Lord Vishnu used his Sudarshan Chakra to destroy the body of Sati, then her right hand thumb fell at this place, so a temple came up here. Also, this is the place where the legendary Ramakrishna Paramahansa was a priest in the East India era.

Me and Avinandan

Sudipta in the front

This is the station ticket counter, designed just like the main temple of Dakhineswar

It was still raining, I wanted to go straight to Sealdah, but Avinandan was adamant about visiting the temple. He is damned good at convincing others, so I didn’t have much of a choice. We 3 were off on foot for darshan.  The rain was attacking us from all sides in turns so we were adjust our umbrellas at different angles. On entering the gates we saw many going here and there. Some were barefooted, some weren’t. There was the main temple complex on our left and the offerings shops on our right. Following the other people we went to a place where we kept our shoes for a token. Then we made for the main temple complex. While entering everyone has t pass through a narrow alley after a little checking. The narrow alley opened up into a huge open space, with many little and medium sized temples arranged neatly along the sides. We could not decide which one to visit first. Anyway, we started off the nearest one. The second one housed the main idol of Ma KALI. Here we had a hilarious incident. The temple itself was on a raised platform, and had quite a number of stairs. We first started on one side, got up the stairs, found our way blocked, came down. Went left, repeated the same thing 3 times, only to find that we had chosen the wrong way all 3 times. Finally, we found that the entrance was on the right side of the stairs we had climbed the first time! It would have been a fine script for a show of Mr. Bean! Laughing at ourselves we went to the other side for darshan. This side had 7 small temples of Lord Shiva, right next to the Ganges.
Taking back our shoes, we left for another temple named ADYAPEATH. On way, we had to ask a lot of people for directions. After walking for about 5 minutes we were there. This place wasn’t as big as Dakhineswar, but a lot more dense with many temples. We were hungry, had some snacks and made for the station. On way, there was a overflowing drain which had drowned up a long street in knee-deep water. Initially, we performed some daredevil long jumps along the little islands on the sides. Ultimately we had to give up. I took lead, dipped my feet and started wading along the street. It was funny and frightening at the same time. Funny coz I like walking in the rains, walking through puddles. It was frightening coz we didn’t know if we were gonna step into the next big pothole. At the end of the ordeal, I was utterly surprised! Avinandan was chatting on the phone throughout!  Talk about multitasking!!
We got to the station and boarded a train for Sealdah. The train was almost empty, given the bad weather. We got off at Sealdah and started our hotel hunt for the night. We started off asking a lone policeman for the nearest hotels, then passed underneath the AJC Bose flyover to the other side. It was muddy everywhere. We went from hotel to hotel but were told there wasn’t any vacant room. Only the A/C ones were vacant but they were gonna burn holes in our pockets. After a long search we managed to find one called Hotel Shefali Dx, where after a hard round of negotiation we got a room for the night for 400. The owner was a fine specimen of a typical boss! He is such a person who never talks and always barks!!He barks both at customers and his assistant (who is always on the edge of losing his temper and killing him). No doubt, customers come to this hotel and put up with this unbearable menace only when they have no other choice.  Just 20 minutes with him and we were going mad. Whenever he turned his back, the assistant silently muttered the worst slangs in his direction. We got a good idea of his frustration when he came upstairs to show us our room. Finally, we got a room. The room didn’t even have proper lighting arrangements. We took a CFL from the bathroom and fitted it in our room for the night. Before going for dinner and retiring for the night we took some pics from our balcony.  The room wasn’t good, but the view of Kolkata was awesome!! The pics we had taken aren’t good enough. This one is the flyover right in front of our hotel.

Look carefully, there is a warning painted on the road

P.S.- Whoever is angry at me because I didn’t visit ur blog, blame it on this 🙂

Of Inbox, Outbox and Drafts

Being more logical than sentimental, I have the uncommon habit of deleting all SMS-es at once. I never save any, don’t care for their emotional value. But lately things have been a bit off schedule and my mailboxes have been piling up. This morning I had a change of mind. I decided to read the old messages from my mobile Inbox and Outbox.  There are around 800 in all right now and all have their own stories worth telling.

There are many “best of luck”s, a few “congrats”es and some “sorry”-s. Apart from these there are the regular “Goodmorning”s, “Goodnight”s, “whatsup buddy?”s etc. Leaving which few are a bit different. Some of these SMS-es remind me of times when someone was in distress and asked for help. Sometimes just simple listening did wonders. Sometimes I had traffic jams in my head, I was terribly sad and wanted to talk my heart out to somebody. Some reflect my subtle diplomacy, some reflect my irrationally emotional moments and so on..

Then I came to the drafts. This is the most interesting of places. Some messages written in full, some left halfway and some just having a few lines or letters. Some written for apologizing, only to find that I had been forgiven already!! Some “sorry”s unsent coz I was too angry to admit my fault and was determined to defend my stand. Some “goodnight”s  left behind coz I slept off before they could be sent.. Some of my freshly baked jokes rotting coz just before being sent, an incoming SMS told me he/she isn’t in the mood for a joke. Some SMS-es written to inform some friends of some good news, only to find that they already know about it! Lastly, some written but not sent coz, they were typed when I needed to pretend being busy 😉

Each one of these have amazing stories worth telling. These remind me of some happy moments and some sad ones. The happy ones remind me of times when I would have wanted time to be frozen there, forever. The sad ones remind of some embarrassing moments, when I would have given my anything to someone who could have fast-forwarded me out of those frames. Pretty strange, that a few SMS-es could show me the movie of my own life. Life goes in a sine wave. It goes on through ups and downs, but never stops. Nothing is stagnant in this universe. These old frames of time, someday these will be replaced by newer ones which shall be lost again. After all I need space for new SMS-es.. So, I go back to my old habit and delete these reminders. All-at-once…

The final day of college life!

My day started with the thought “What if I can’t write anything today in my exams, I don’t wanna fail in the last one…”. It was real scary.

By 10 I was at the exam hall. It was the usual scene; most were preparing cheat-papers and writing on benches with pencils etc. Few were talking about the extreme heat of the summer, laughing at some anecdotes and so on.  I was feeling as if I was in a slaughterhouse about to be killed. Cheating in exams that is something I had never done before. I didn’t expect that myself being able to do that without being caught. The question papers arrived 5 minutes earlier, it killed me on the first look just as I expected. There wasn’t a single question that I could have answered by myself, all were lengthy derivations and I hadn’t prepared them at all. Something else was playing at my fate today. Suddenly something like a heat wave rushed over me and I uttered “Hey Adra, Pass me the cheat”. I was surprised at my tone of voice. This was one of the strangest things I have ever done. Next 2 hours went like breeze! I deftly cheated throughout the paper. I completed the paper with 1 hour left. There was ample time left to throw away the cheats through the broken window behind me. Time became slow. I could not wait to submit my paper and break into the final celebration of my college life! After the exam I ran to the library to submit my last library book and it was done! I was free! We started writing on shirts in the library itself (on other days this would have earned us a good scolding, but not today). Friends and all, we had become a family. Today it was time to depart, time for the last get-together. It was time to get emotional, time to speak those unspoken words we had in our hearts for years. It was time to show off our pent-up sentiments and so on…. Here, u can see some pictures my friends taken by my friend Avinandan.

In front of our library

                  

Afterwards, we decided to spend the night at Sudipta’s mess and visit Sudipta’s hometown tomorrow. I had to do some packing and stuff, so I came back home. An hour later me  Avinandan and Arijit we  3 joined the 3 others, Suvajit, Suvayan and Sudipta (remember the making of the song “college er sei dingulo“?). For dinner we went to restaurant named “PANCH-PHORON” (it is a Bengali spice).Enjoyed a hefty dinner, but it was already past 10 so, we were gonna have to walk the distance back. Luckily enough we got the last bus on the route. It was already running late, so we were at Sudipta’s mess in no time. I got to mention, in my B.Tech life of 4 years, I haven’t ever seen these buses going so fast! Avinandan was adamant about taking a his first sip of beer. Sadly enough, there were many who had planned to take the first sip tonight! as a result we could not find any good one. At last we found a bottle of Haywards 5000, it wasn’t chilled though. Arijit had bought a cold 2l Sprite. We decided that it should be mixed with the beer to lower its temperature. Avinandan was the first to take a sip. But he could not drink much. The rest of the bottle was finished by Arijit and Sudipta. Then we decided for game of cards. I am lousy player, so I was taking a little rest and the others were playing. Around 2 am everybody got tired and we came out of the room into the open air.

Now it is 2 3o am. Tonight, sitting outside by the side of a well, with a few of my friends under the open sky, counting the stars and yawning, we are reflecting on our life for the last 4 years. It was 8th August 2008, that we started this journey, the journey of 4 years of B.Tech. Looking back there are a lot of sweet and sour memories but most have been victims of my short-term memory. So I am keeping quiet, laughing at their anecdotes. In the meantime we can hear funny noises from the girls mess just beside the place we were sitting and we are wondering aloud what they are up to.. I am terribly sleepy, but trying to keep myself awake.

This is our last night together, A memory we shall cherish forever!

a milestone on our way to the end..

Yesterday, it was the last lab exam of my B.Tech.. getting pretty nostalgic right now. But this attack isnt as emotional as I had expected..

The day started with much excitement. Remember that song I was talking about in “Finally it happened“. We were planning to do a video recording of the song and dedicate it to all of us friends. Anyway, it was a typical Indian summer day. News forecast had warned that it was going to be 45 °C around noon, and it was hot indeed. Anyway, after the exams I took the bus to my friend, Sudipta’s mess.

Sudipta, posing with the guitar

Getting down at the bus stoppage I thought, I might have a bottle of Amul Kool, (saffron flavored milk). I bought one. No sooner had I put it to my lips, than I noticed two hooded guys approaching me. I was puzzled for a second at least, but their style of walking gave away. At once I recognised them; one was Suvayan (our lead singer)

Suvayan, our lead vocalist

and the other Avinandan (our only musician).

Avinandan, our only musician

Thankfully, they had come to pick me up. I was on the pillion when I heard the shopkeeper caliing me back. He had forgotten that I had already paid and was asking for it again. Damn! I never cheat on anybody, and how dare did he accuse me? Somehow, I managed to convince him of the truth and stomped off.. I left my bottle of Amul Kool there, it still had a some left in it..

With the usual welcome, I saw Suvajit was setting the plates and dishes for a treat of chicken Biriyani.

Suvajit, serving the BIRIYANI

It didn’t take much time to finish off the Biriyani, washed down with a few gulps of Thums-up. Then started the rehearsals for the song.

initial tuning..

Suvajit, posing with the guitar

Avinandan would think up and play some tunes and we would try to match it to the lyrics. It went on for around 20 mins. Finally we come to a decision on the song opening tunes. Then the rest went like a breeze. The different stanzas were being sung along with with the guitar.  The song video was being shot in pieces. Since this was our first chorus with a guitar in company, little flaws came up now and then. Somewhere the lines were too long, somewhere too short. But it was funny posing as composers and music directors 😉 .

We didn’t know when time flew by, until we heard someone shouting outside. We had frozen in our places for a minute, till Sudipta came back. He explained that ourselves, composing songs and singing at the top of our lungs, had added to his neighbors’ misery on that hot afternoon. Our rehearsals came to an abrupt halt, but we were too charged up to stop the shooting midway.. Suvajit then decided that we better go to another place (his previous mess), and within 10 minutes we were there. The juniors living there were kind enough to let us go on with our shooting, even after the abrupt murder of their afternoon naps on such a hot day. We are grateful to them. Now, the final stanzas were shot. Still, we hadn’t shot the whole song in a single video. So, it we shot another two to three videos on the whole song. The last one was the best. I have put it on YouTube, click here.

The journey to the end, has begun

Yesterday, it was the last sessional exam of our final semester. Most of my friends were getting emotional about it. Yet, I was strangely unaffected. Maybe because, I was more concerned about our college project than anything else. Meanwhile, a friend from Computer Science department called up. She asked me to wait outside the admin block after the exams. I found it intriguing as she didn’t give any reason. I asked her in jest if she was planning to beat me up 😉 . After the exams I was waiting at the admin block. After a couple of minutes she appeared. Still I had no idea what she was planning to do..

Taking out a shining digicam from her bag, she said, “Today is the last sessional exam of our college life, never know when all of us may see each other again”. So she was taking snaps of all her friends, to commemorate the day. She called  another friend of mine who was passing by,  and asked him to take our snap. Standing there, I was felt something. Something unusual… Finally, I was getting emotional. There was a traffic jam in my head. Thoughts and memories were honking violently to get my attention.

Never again, I would sit for those sessionals. Never again, I would stare at my studious friends taking extra sheets and scribbling away violently. Never again, friends would tease me saying “Ask him, he is a know-all” and so on.. I am already missing them, terribly 😥

Just another couple of months, I will be severing all my ties with college life..

The journey to the end has begun..

Why I blog? A short account..

The question is quite old. It has been asked and answered by millions. Mostly the answers are quite same. But flavors are different. After all everyone is unique. Here is mine.. 🙂

I was an introvert. Most of  the time I used to swim in my own mind. I always felt like people were always out there to get me, humiliate me in public. I was a hell of shy kid. Apart from that I am very curious person. I like to to try out everything at least once.  So, when I heard about the bloggers meet in my college, I thought  of giving it a try. Watching my best friend Indrajit going around flaunting a new “BCET Bloggers” badge, I decided to have a blog of my own.

I first started one on blogger.com . It was a complete disaster. Then I came to WordPress. Another two disasters were born. I don’t even remember their names. Then came SantuOnline at last. It never had any visits or likes, because I didn’t know then about the resource called “tag“. It was September last year, that I discovered tags and my number of visits and likes grew. I got a handsome number of followers too. 🙂

I still didn’t know why I was into blogging? It was like beer. Bitter to taste, but drinking feels good. (just an example, I don’t drink 😉 ) At first, I used to search for different tags and related posts. I used to like all the pages I visited. I just knew the more I “like”-d the more visits I would get. It was a sort of race against time. I  didn’t have much time everyday, but tried to do as many as possible “likes”.

Slowly, I began to slow down. Strange to hear, but that is exactly how it happened. Now, I didn’t just visit at random, and put in likes. I took my time to read each blog I visited, put in some comments and thoughts. It became a healthy outlet for my mind. My perspective changed. I met many like minded people on wordpress. Swimming in my own  mind, I had accumulated tons of doubts and junk. They got cleaned. There is still a lot more to do, but it feels better now.

Needless to say, blogging has now become more than just an obsession. It is source of daily inspiration. I am not as shy as I used to be. I have opened up a lot. I am more confident. Now I don’t feel like people are always out there to humiliate me. Here, I can speak my mind without fear. I can ask any type of foolish question without being branded as immature. There are so many people here. One is bound to find at least another one just like self. It is so easy to relate on blogosphere.

Having found some exact matches of mine, I wonder “aren’t we all unique?!! then where did these people come from? ” 🙂

being Xaverian for a couple o’ hours

The thought of being able to attend an exam in the prestigious St. Xaviers college had me going “WAAaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAOoooow!!!”. It was a chance of a lifetime for an ordinary student from WBUT, to spend around 3 hours there. It was like a dream come true, (although I had never dreamt of it :D)

We started off on our journey around 8 am. Took a bus to Park street. Getting off there, we asked a policeman about St. Xaviers college. He directed us towards another road and we went off walking. It is no mean distance to walk, when it is a summer day. After some time, we saw a crowd in a distance.The first thing I noticed was a huge red building with yellow bordered windows. It was the St. Xaviers. There were some banners hanging outside. They were about the reunion of the alumni and some tech fest. I asked my friend Avinandan if I was dreaming, and he pinched me 😉 . There were around a hundred people. All waiting. The studious and serious were revising. Some were chatting on phone, mostly girls. And as usual, guys were gawping at the perfect figurines. There was one with so much of eye makeup, one might have mistaken her for having 4 eyelids! 🙂

Around half an hour later, we were asked to make a queue. There was a brief rush and the footpath was clear. The queue started advancing. Being at the last, I was looking at all the heads ahead. It was funny to see all those heads in a line, swaying to and fro, bobbing up and down. Reminded me of centipedes. Once inside, we were directed to our designated class rooms. My place was room number 12, 1st row from the door, 3rd bench. Then there was the usual exam scene. The room was buzzing. At the stroke of 10, the room fell silent. The questions were twisting my brain out of shape and I was telling myself “Shoot, how am I gonna spend 2 hours???”

Anyhow, I managed to spend the time answering 30 questions out of 60. Afterwards, I was very thirsty. Searching for water, I went further inside. A corridor led me to the playground. Rooted to a spot I did a 360 degree turn, and once again, I was going “WAAaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAOoooooooww!!!”. It was magnificent and huge.

There were some foreigner students taking snaps. With so many blondes all around, I was a bit uneasy. Walking past them, I was humbled. I wondered, “তোরাই জীবনে কিছু করলি, আমরা  শুধু বোকার  মতন  তাকিয়ে  তাকিয়ে দেখেই  যাব ”      (You r great, you guys have actually done something in your life, we the fools will always be left watching)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

We were walking back to Park street bus stop. On the way, we walked past “Music World” store and “Flurrys“. Flurrys reminded me of a  scene from the film “Parineeta“, where Sanjay Dutt bets a game of cards with Riya Sen. By now, I was quite used to so many blondes roaming around. Thus the Flurrys didn’t bother me much. Then there was the historic “Asiatic society“!! I was thrilled. For a moment, it felt like things were coming right out of my old history books. Afterwards, we walked to Esplanade. There I witnessed for the first time in my life, a gay couple. Among the two, one looked like a normal guy, but the other looked like a girl to the bone 😉

Today my Barber was frustrated

Tired of playing angry birds since morning, I remembered that I needed a shave and haircut. It has been over 47 days and counting..

At the first sight, the barber contorted his face, he hadn’t expected. He knew this wasn’t going to be another normal haircut (I mean the regular way, sprinking water, then trimming off with a comb and a pair of scissors, working smoothly etc.)

He pulled out a drawer from under a desk, took a bit bigger pair of scissors and went on a demolition derby on my head. He was “snipping my locks” without mercy and at random angles. I was noticing all of this, but didnt care much. Except for the occasional pricking pain at my hair roots, there wasnt much to care about. He didnt use the comb till the end. When he finally did take the comb, he raked down a ball of hair off my head, about the size of my face.
I was scared out of my wits!

Had I gone bald??

Had I gone bald??? I was starting to dream about horrible scenes of my friends making fun of me, right when the mirror told me that my hair was shorter than I had asked for. Thats all. I wasnt bald! phew.. Like a load had been taken off my chest..

P.S. Throughout the exercise till the end, I could feel his frustrated breath on my neck. 🙂

I got my B’Day gift!

After a long wait, I got my bday gift from my friends. Nagging them day n night, it was fun asking when when I would be getting the gift. They too used to say in the same tone, “sabr ka fal meetha hota hai” (meaning, being patient gets u sweeter fruits) 😉 It was really nice gifts!

They gave me this nice leather wallet from Shreeleathers and a Wild Stone deo

My own wallet has become worn out, it is over 2 years old. So, this new wallet is gonna be used soon. But the deo has such a nice odour. Man! I could be sniffing at it for hours and hours together. Frankly, I dont use deo. Dats why, I am gonna keep it safe. I am gonna preserve it as a souvenier from my last year in college.

Someday, It is gonna take me down the memory lane…
I might be sniffing at the deo, again…
Most probably,
my eyes would be moist then…

A day of protest at my college

I joined the protests on the 3rd day,  around 10 in the morning. The scene at the college gate was an unusual one. Students (around 600 by strength), all were squatting at the college gate. Heads were bobbing up and down throughout, all shouting slogans against the college management. It was the most unusual sight in my college. (I should mention, our college management is a Draconian one. Fully dictatorial. Nobody ever dared saying a word against. So, this was the most unusual sight.)

I went in, sat down with others. Initially I was silent. It took me sometime to warm up to the atmosphere of protest, then I joined the chorus. It was a hot day. So some students took initiative and arranged for water bottles.Some took rounds at leading the SLOGAN-eering. Pent up anger of years had got a vent. It was nothing like I had done before, and being a part of such a huge protest felt awesome! After what felt like 1/2 an hour, I took a look at my phone for the time. It was 1 pm! 3 hours had passed by without any notice! My stomach gave a slight growl of hunger, and within minutes I was on my way for lunch.

I returned around a hour later. This time, this following scene gave me goose bumps.

There was a whole police team armed with bamboo sticks and tear gas guns. My heart was racing fast, feet went cold, sweat drops were pricking me in the neck..Uff.. I could have fainted. Right then something brought me back to my senses. A group of girls were sitting right next to the policeman with the gun. If they could shout fearlessly, what was holding me back?? –I call this, “Inspiration, staring u in the face!“– I took my place on the ground and joined the chorus again. 1/2 an hour later, the policemen did retreat and left us even more confident, our voices grew even louder! In between, when we were tired of “Slogan”-ering, we had short chats about our 4 years of our college. There were short rounds of  narration, anecdotes, laughter and fun. But everytime anybody from the college management was visible, we started shouting again.

Around 7 PM we broke up the assembly. Telling each other to meet at the same place next morning, we came back to our rooms.

A tiring day it was. Lying in my bed, there was a feeling of accomplishment, inspiration and lots of fun. Most importantly, I was felt braver than ever. 🙂

My first metro ride!

The day began with an unusual excitement and slight tension. Tomorrow I got to attend another job interview. This time, I have to take the whole journey by myself,  all alone… After packing, I went to buy the tickets, the shop was closed. A look at my mobile told me, I had gone there early. To pass the time I went to visit my friend Arijit. 10 am in the morning, and he was still sleeping. Noticing that, I thought of running off, but aunty wouldn’t let me go. I was very much pleasantly surprised that Arijit wasn’t angry at me for waking him up 😛 . Helpful as always, he gave me some proper directions to reach my destination. He also gave me some contacts, whom I may ask in case of emergency and the most important thing!!! He had given me detailed explanations on the way to travel by Metro trains.

By 12:30 I was on my bus. It was time for departure. contrary to the cold and cloudy morning weather, now it was a warm noon, leaving me sweating under my jeans.. The whole journey was quite uneventful, except for a little jam at Panagarh. By 4 pm, I was at esplanade. Knocking down people with my huge rucksack, I was walking up and down around esplanade. For this is the first time, that I had such a  chance to explore a new place all by myself. No rules, no limits, nobody to tell upon me..

Keeping exploring aside, I called up my elder bro to inform him of my location. He straightaway replied “take the BBD-Garia bus, and come to my place”. Bit apprehensive, I asked him if I could take the Metro Train route. He paused for a few moments, my hair was standing on edge for the climax…

Finally he said,”yes, if u have traveled by a metro before”.. I went ecstatic!!!! Crossed the road in a run, and there it was. A LED display board over my head, inviting me into esplanade metro station. At first I couldn’t find the ticket counter. A policewoman gave me proper directions. At the counter, I was given a plastic token. Then I crossed the barrier. Took the escalator, down into the station. I asked a person where to wait for the train and went to the platform indicated. I was a bit nervous. But the height of it happened when a crowded train came on the opposite platform. People were jostling to get in and out of the train. I was thinking, “this is no 8B bus that will wait till I am in. If the door shuts with me in between, or worse, if  I am not able to get on the train at all…”  I must have shown some signs, or maybe for my perspiring forehead, some people were curiously looking at me. That was complicating matters even more.. that is why, I was both surprised and happy when I saw that my train was quite empty!!! The train came to a halt, the doors opened. Instinctively, I sort of jumped in, my rucksack knocking off two men 😉 . No empty seat, I had to stand. Standing near the door, my eyes were wandering over the numerous heads and faces. I was sure no one around me was a novice at riding a metro. Some were dozing off in their seats. Some blabbering among themselves, some others looking at them and listening as if students in a class. A few tall heads were towering over all. In the meantime, my attention was interrupted by the mikes announcing the station names. Some had noticed my curiosity and were trying to be curious about me :-P.. All of a sudden, the announcement said “next station, MAHANAYAK UTTAM KUMAR, platform on the left side”. I got ready. The train came to a slow halt. This time I got off smoothly. Following other passengers, a deposited my token and got out of the station.. My first metro ride, all alone!!!!

P.S. sorry to disappoint my readers, but I couldn’t get pics good enough for this post

A JOB INTERVIEW, 3rd in my life,1st one away from home-> the journey ends..

Finally, a long awaited event comes to an end. Today we are returning back to durgapur.A few minutes ago Karthik left for his interview. we are getting ready, to leave. The caretaker has already told us to leave within 9 am, but I dont  think we would be able to get out of here before 9 30.. 😉

Well, it has been an eventful journey. A rich experience for the three of us and it is very hard to summarize all of this in a few words. Thats why i have tried to put it all in this collage

the whole journey, in a single frame..

For me, 2011 has been a series of misfortunes and bad experiences. Thats why, I had never expected the year to end on such a good note. Yet, it did.Someone said it right “All is well that ends well“. Lets hope, 2012 may bring happiness and luck for all of us… 🙂

A JOB INTERVIEW, 3rd in my life,1st one away from home -> Results are declared..

Today is my birthday! Thats why last  night my two partners, karthik and saaki gave me the B’DAY BASH!

We were supposed to get the results around 9pm last night. Yet, 8 am in the morning, and we were still waiting. Every now and then we were checking our mails, doing FB. My FB wall was overflowing with Happy Bday wishes..U know, in my life of 21 years I had never got so many BDAY Wishes in one day. Waiting for the mail, we were getting hungry..Then we went out for breakfast.

O! That reminds me of something. Last night we had seen a extremely lean dog, with a narrow face. It looked just like “KREACHER”, the elf of HARRY POTTER movies. So whenever we see any dog, Karthik says “Kreacher!!” and we have a nice laugh.. Today we were late for breakfast, so the “kochuri”s were finished. We had “paratha” and “Ghugni”. Then we returned back to our rooms and a surprise was waiting..

Guess what?? Our results had been declared! Karthik had cleared the test, me and Saaki didn’t. So after a short round of applause and facebook updates, we 2 settled down to watch “HOW TO TRAIN YOUR DRAGON”, an animation movie. I was also planning to visit my friends staying in HOWRAH, but there wasn’t sufficient time left, to go there and return. Karthik was supposed to report for his interview around 3 30 at the WBUT, salt lake today. There wasn’t much time left for him. So he went out,  took a chair and sat on the porch. He was revising all the topics and we were enjoying our free time. There is some benefit to failing after all..

Wishing karthik best of luck, we all went out. He took a taxi, and we went to a hotel for lunch. The manager was very talkative, he would go on speaking to u and u wud have to listen even if u don’t like that. Had a solid lunch. After that, I thought since we don’t have anything o do, lets go for a walk. So we went off roaming towards Alipore More. Saw a large number of high rise buildings, there was a whole high rise building labelled “GOLD’S gym”. We learnt a lot about bus numbers and bus routes. We walked for around a hour and returned back. On the way we had a chat about our favourite heroes and films. He told me to watch “shutter island”, featuring Leonardo Di Caprio whenever I get time. Having nothing to do, I went to sleep, Saaki was watching “the mummy” on my lappy. I woke up in the evening. Afterwards I went out to buy 2 eggrolls. Bad luck, then another idea struck. I went to a sweet shop, ordered for  3 “rasogollas”. Just like I guessed, the rasogollas were fresh and warm! They just melted in my mouth. I ordered another three for saaki. He too had a pleasant surprise!! And just as he was finishing them, karthik came in. His interview has been postponed to tomorrow 9 30 am. Again a little bit of Facebook-ing, teasing etc. Then we had dinner and came back to our rooms. Karthik seems quite tense. He is shuffling through the books and topics. And I am going off to sleep. Tomorrow, we shall return to Durgapur..